blockage
As I went to bed yesterday, I had this feeling that maybe God had spoken to me in the morning, but I couldn't remember what He said. So I flipped open my notebook and there it was. I am grateful I take notes because my brain is not so reliable! Though the time I wrote it was 4am, so I can't be too hard on myself.
3 young men
In Kingston there have been 3 young men who died under rather mysterious circumstances. The geographic area of their deaths is pretty small.
Joe G. died on a November night a number of years ago. How he ended up dead in the water was never determined.
This past August, a young Greek boy- 2nd year at Carlton, I believe- died when his car mysteriously accelerated and flipped on King St. instead of making the turn up Beverly st. to his home. This was 4am. It is unlikely if they'll ever figure that out as the impact killed him.
This past week a young Queen's student fell out of a window at the residence at some point in the night/early morning (he was found at 6am). If you take a look at the windows, they are very difficult to 'fall' out of. Mysterious and showing the fingers of evil really.
On a completely different note, I felt God bring me up short today as I had not been praying for the municipal elections. I'm way more about people than politics. But politics at its heart is about people, even though it often doesn't seem that way.
On yet another note, I went to a baptist church today that I had visited once before. Last time, I arrived too early and had to stand awkwardly until the minute before the service started when everyone went down to the room. I much prefer slipping into a seat and waiting. So this time I arrived later- maybe 30 seconds before they did the group movement downstairs. So this was better for me in that I did not need to stand for long. In fact I saw James who used to go to Rustle (he was wearing glasses so I didn't recognize him at first). I asked him if he had moved. But he still lives on Rustle St., just goes elsewhere to church. Whatever makes a person grow the best, I'm all for them going there!
Anyway, because I stopped to talk to James by the time I got downstairs, most people were seated. And they all sat in the back rows. So, that meant that I had to sit conspicuously at the front. I really would rather fade into the woodwork but that was not happening today. So, after the service the Pastor greeted me thinking it was my first time. I explained that I live a few blocks away and had been there once before, so I wasn't totally new. He seemed surprised and said something like maybe he was away. And I said, no you were speaking. This threw him off a bit. But I can understand if you are speaking you may be so focused on that that you don't notice people. It really didn't bother me. They always have pizza after the evening service and so he, being polite, made sure to invite me. I had to decline and the reason I gave him (though I don't believe he was still listening, which was good!) was "I don't eat". Which is obviously not true. I don't like to eat with other people. But as he really wasn't listening anymore I didn't need to explain my misspeakedness.
I was quite nervous going to a new place (even though I had been there once before) but it was very good for me to go. The message was excellent- on the will of God and prayer. The speaker was named Chris and he talked about how there was a geographic will of God (where should I live? what should my career be? He included prayers for healing in this)- these have no specific answers in the Bible but we are encouraged to pray for them. He said another category of the will of God was the moral will of God and this is what is found in the Bible. Prayers for this would include prayers of repentance and to be more holy and more like Jesus. He suggested that a lot of prayers tend to be dedicated to the geographic will of God, which is important but not as important as the moral will of God. Thoughts?
1 Samuel 4
At night James and I read some from his children's Bible as well as a portion of a kids devotional book.
Today's reading was from 1 Samuel 4
5 When the ark of the LORD's covenant came into the camp, all Israel raised such a great shout that the ground shook. 6 Hearing the uproar, the Philistines asked, "What's all this shouting in the Hebrew camp?"
When they learned that the ark of the LORD had come into the camp, 7 the Philistines were afraid. "A god has come into the camp," they said. "We're in trouble! Nothing like this has happened before. 8 Woe to us! Who will deliver us from the hand of these mighty gods? They are the gods who struck the Egyptians with all kinds of plagues in the desert. 9 Be strong, Philistines! Be men, or you will be subject to the Hebrews, as they have been to you. Be men, and fight!"
10 So the Philistines fought, and the Israelites were defeated and every man fled to his tent. The slaughter was very great; Israel lost thirty thousand foot soldiers. 11 The ark of God was captured Apparently Israel wasn't doing so well at the battle thing.
So they decided to bring God into it.
And that got them excited!
Because you surely can't lose a battle if God is with you? Right?
Well, God was with them and they still got beat bad.
So what went wrong?
Because I see this today. People who have God with them, still getting beaten up.
I feel it too.
Did God want the Philistines to win?
Does God want us to lose?
Of course not!
But do we lose? Yes.
What is wrong then? Are we fighting battles that God does not want us to fight?
The problem in the story above seemed to be that the people weren't listening to God.
He told them in the previous chapter that he was going to execute judgment on sin (specifically on Eli's family but as he was the priest of Israel, that was kind of like judgment on Israel)
What God wanted from that was repentance. He wanted change. He didn't want to destroy Eli's family and many Israelites. He didn't want to, but they weren't listening.
Help us to stick close to you. To really listen to you. To repent and change when you want us to.
Trust
There are lots of times when I have to remember to trust God. Remember that I'm not on my own.
However, there have been 2 distinct times (one being yesterday) that I have felt God saying that He trusted me.
And I was "WHAT?". Now that doesn't seem like a smart thing to do, to trust me.
I would think it's much better to trust HIM.
But since He's inside me, I guess I am trusting Him in a way anyway.
It seems that sometimes we pray for God to tell us what to do and how to handle it when He's like - I made you. You can do it. I trust you.
I don't want to let Him down!
Am I doing everything to follow your will? (Sanctus Real- whatever you're doing)
Out of the whirlwind
A month ago a chain of events occurred that was a bit of a whirlwind that I was on the periphery of. I say that because that's where I see myself but in actuality I may have been nearer the eye. I was very involved in praying with the family. And now a month out, things have settled down. I am in the process of writing everything down. It's not something that I can write here but it is good to write it.
A couple of days ago, I met with my friend from the previous post. I think things went better that I had hoped it could go. I am hopeful that she can turn this around.
