Solitude
As the holiday approaches, I am both looking forward to it and not. I like seeing my family again. I think it will be good for me to take a break.
But I miss my house and my times of solitude. I have made some plans so that I won't go totally crazy while I'm gone.
I am very tired and I find it hard to sleep in new places (new being any place other than my home!) but I am still hopeful that the trip will allow me to catch up on some sleep.
What's up?
Since the start of December, my dreams have gone wild. There have been an awful lot of them. I don't know what happened with Spiderman to make his 'spidersenses' tingle, but if I have a lot of dreams, that makes my spiritual senses tingle! I am expectant that God is up to something. We are expecting change at Rustle, as our financial ties with Next are ending soon, and with Brandon heading where God calls him. It's like Rustle is a baby being forced into a growth spurt. It is natural. It is planned. But it requires spiritual energy. I feel that God is saying that it will require spiritual energy from me but that he is in the process of equipping me for what he needs me to do. I'm kinda scared, but I trust Him.
Why I shouldn't read blogs during my lunchhour at work
I
read that someone I am praying for is not doing very well. I wish it were not so. I can't even begin to fathom this.
Torn
I had an answer to prayer. Specifically,
this prayer. I believed that I would get an answer and I figured it would probably be painful. And it was. It was like having spiritual dental surgery. All I saw in front of my face yesterday was this tooth being ripped out. And that's what it felt like too. Ow. I am wise enough to know that that space has to be filled by the holy spirit, other wise something worse might fill it's place or it might come back, or whatever. Luke 11:
24"When an evil spirit comes out of a man, it goes through arid places seeking rest and does not find it. Then it says, 'I will return to the house I left.' 25When it arrives, it finds the house swept clean and put in order. 26Then it goes and takes seven other spirits more wicked than itself, and they go in and live there. And the final condition of that man is worse than the first."
I don't know if it was an evil spirit or not, but I'm thinking the principle is the same with bad habits and the like.
Yesterday, I had been up from 2-4am (thanks to James waking me at 2 and me not able to get back to sleep) and with this going on, I went to bed at 9pm. I was very tired from the rough night. And the walking 6km in the snow. And this. When I woke up in the morning, I was angry, but it didn't last long. I think the pain subsided enough that I was able to feel anger, but it did pass when I realized that this is where I wanted to be. Let's hope for a day of healing today.
1 Kings
I really like reading the end of 1 Kings because of the personality of the characters that show through.
When Ben-Haddad boasts, Ahab replies to him
"Tell him: 'One who puts on his armor should not boast like one who takes it off.' "1 Kings 20:11
Then Ben-Haddad gets to drinking and starts the fight. Which he loses. Moral: Don't start fights when you've been drinking.
Near the end of the chapter Ban-Haddad surrenders and makes a deal with Ahab and Ahab sets him free. But because Ahab does his own will and not God's will, God tells him he is going to die.
Then in chapter 21 Ahab again decides that his own will is more important and Naboth dies so Ahab can have the vineyard. Then out of nowhere Elijah appears and prophesies all kinds of nasty things to Ahab. Then chapter 21:25-26
Ahab, pushed by his wife Jezebel and in open defiance of God, set an alltime record in making big business of evil. He indulged in outrageous obscenities in the world of idols, copying the Amorites whom God had earlier kicked out of Israelite territory.
And the very next verse after that Ahab gets all repentant and the Lord decides that the nasty stuff won't happen that day, but later.
A part that really cracks me up is the interchange between Micaiah and the kings in Chapter 22.
6 The king of Israel got the prophets together—all four hundred of them —and put the question to them: "Should I attack Ramoth Gilead? Or should I hold back?"
"Go for it," they said. "God will hand it over to the king."
7 But Jehoshaphat dragged his heels: "Is there still another prophet of God around here we can consult?"
8 The king of Israel told Jehoshaphat, "As a matter of fact, there is still one such man. But I hate him. He never preaches anything good to me, only doom, doom, doom—Micaiah son of Imlah."
"The king shouldn't talk about a prophet like that," said Jehoshaphat.
9 So the king of Israel ordered one of his men, "On the double! Get Micaiah son of Imlah."
10-12 Meanwhile, the king of Israel and Jehoshaphat were seated on their thrones, dressed in their royal robes, resplendent in front of the Samaria city gates. All the prophets were staging a prophecy-performance for their benefit. Zedekiah son of Kenaanah had even made a set of iron horns, and brandishing them called out, "God's word! With these horns you'll gore Aram until there's nothing left of him!" All the prophets chimed in, "Yes! Go for Ramoth Gilead! An easy victory! God's gift to the king!"
13 The messenger who went to get Micaiah said, "The prophets have all said Yes to the king. Make it unanimous—vote Yes!"
14 But Micaiah said, "As surely as God lives, what God says, I'll say."
15 With Micaiah before him, the king asked him, "So Micaiah—do we attack Ramoth Gilead, or do we hold back?"
"Go ahead," he said. "An easy victory. God's gift to the king."
16 "Not so fast," said the king. "How many times have I made you promise under oath to tell me the truth and nothing but the truth?"
17 "All right," said Micaiah, "since you insist.
I saw all of Israel scattered over the hills,
sheep with no shepherd.
Then God spoke: 'These poor people
have no one to tell them what to do.
Let them go home and do
the best they can for themselves.'"
18 Then the king of Israel turned to Jehoshaphat, "See! What did I tell you? He never has a good word for me from God, only doom."
19-23 Micaiah kept on: "I'm not done yet; listen to God's word:
I saw God enthroned,
and all the angel armies of heaven
Standing at attention
ranged on his right and his left.
And God said, 'How can we seduce Ahab
into attacking Ramoth Gilead?'
Some said this,
and some said that.
Then a bold angel stepped out,
stood before God, and said,
'I'll seduce him.'
'And how will you do it?' said God.
'Easy,' said the angel,
'I'll get all the prophets to lie.'
'That should do it,' said God.
'On your way—seduce him!'
"And that's what has happened. God filled the mouths of your puppet prophets with seductive lies. God has pronounced your doom."
24 Just then Zedekiah son of Kenaanah came up and punched Micaiah in the nose, saying, "Since when did the Spirit of God leave me and take up with you?"
25 Micaiah said, "You'll know soon enough; you'll know it when you're frantically and futilely looking for a place to hide."
It's too good. Though, I think it loses something without the intonation. In v.14 he says he say what the Lord says and then in v.15 he lies, but it's really obvious to the kings. Then they make him tell the truth and they are like- see he always says bad stuff! Then the guy gets punched in the nose and later - locked up. Oh, to be an old testament prophet!
Sometimes, we want what we want and not what God wants and that's not good. Sometimes we want to hear only good things but we also want the truth so that creates pretty crazy situations for the other people involved!
